By: Cecil and featuring Mika
Dark cold air fills her senses as she glances over at the clock. Tick, tick, tick. A teacher she’s known since she was six years old tells her and her friends the staff is ready to see them.
But are they?
They walk inside the dimly lit room and their favorite teachers snack and talk pleasantly amongst themselves while they set up their presentation with shaking hands, and stumble through it weakly in an attempt to reclaim their bodies. And they got what they asked for, it’s true. But what they asked for may not have been what they were too scared to say they really wanted.
In sixth grade my class got handed the ‘middle school handbook’ for the first time. I remember the ripples of displeasure as we flipped through the freshly printed pages and scrawled our names in messy writing on the front. It contained rules for internet etiquette, details about homework and grades, as well as the dress code. At the time, I was furious to read that bra straps weren’t allowed to stick out of shirt and that if I adjusted my position and my stomach showed, I would have to tie a sweatshirt around my waist. I knew other schools had it worse, I had heard as much from summer camp friends, but the concept of a dress code was never a reality to me. It felt unfair that these words could control me and that they weren’t even hiding. Just sitting there, plain as day and unashamed to be policing an eleven year old’s body. I couldn’t believe parts of my body were not allowed. No one said it, but it didn’t take long for me to view certain parts of my body as distractions, rather than skin. When I went home after my first day of middle school, I tried on all my clothes and carefully crafted outfits that wouldn’t violate the dress code. When I spoke to my classmates and friends about the situation, I discovered that we felt similarly. Eventually we spoke to one of our teachers and decided we could make a presentation to the staff about changes we’d like to see in the dress code. At the time, we were afraid to ask for what we wanted so we compromised before even knowing what the staff’s answer would be. We didn’t say we didn’t want there to even be a dress code, we just cited three specific rules we wanted to see change. We worked for hours at a time trying to figure out how to be assertive but not disrespectful. It was a difficult task because at the time we felt disrespected. It was months before we saw any changes implemented and at the time it felt so empowering to be heard like that, we told ourselves we had gotten what we wanted and called it a day, but while we got what we asked for, does that really solve the issue of having our bodies policed?
These days, my family tells the story of how their ‘brilliant kid’ went to the staff and ‘demanded’ changes to all of our extended family. I sit and smile while wishing I had said what I wanted, rather than what I thought was reasonable.
A school with no dress code? Ugh as if! An eleven year old and her friends could hardly write a presentation to sell that point. We probably couldn’t even start that conversation. While it may be an unreasonable ask, the feeling is that a dress code actually creates space for sexism. I didn’t see any part of my body as a distraction until you wrote that I should cover it up. Nobody wrote it in my school dress code, but look at thousands of other schools and you’ll find strict dress codes, leaving no room for self expression while targeting feminine presenting youth and sexualizing young people’s bodies.
In the 2017-18 school year, 42.6% of elementary schools in the U.S. reported they enforced a strict dress code for their students.
61.6% of middle schools.
55.9% of high schools.
More middle schools than high schools reported this. Schools policed more 11-14 year olds than they did 14-18. Not to say that anyone’s body should be policed, just that it’s interesting schools felt the need to police people whose bodies are still developing rather than older, young adults, like eighteen year olds.
Dress codes are supposed to create positive learning environments and put bans on offensive shirts and pins, not police young people- especially feminine presenting people. We visited eight grade student Mika and asked her how she felt about the dress code.
Q: How do you feel about the dress code?
A: I don’t approve of it and I think it’s unnecessary especially at our age because we’re only thirteen and it's rooted in problematic ideas that shouldn’t be taken out on thirteen year olds.
Q: Why do you feel this way?
A: Well, I know that the dress code is very much targeted towards women and especially curvier women and is unfairly enforced and I think it’s um it focuses heavily on making sure young girls don’t wear revealing clothing which is unfair because as literal children we should be able to wear what we want without being sexualized by adults.
Q: Do you have any stories or real life examples of this?
A: My first memory of synergy is when I was in fifth grade an I walked by the middle school and I walked by a group of sixth grade girls who were laughing because one of them got dress coded on the first day of school for wearing a halter top that showed her shoulders which is funny because she’s literally an eleven year old.
Q: Do you think dress codes are justified?
A: I think that they can be justified but only to a certain extent. I think that maybe a workplace can have a dress code but not like schools like middle schools or high schools because you are there to educate literally minors. I think that PE dress codes are fine but for a lot of dress codes it is all about making young girls cover up to prevent them from distracting men and boys.
So, is it really too much to ask for a school with no dress code? Are we really taking it too far, by requesting that fully grown adults leave room for our self expression and stop sexualizing our bodies? It’s not entirely unreasonable, but many adults would love to have us think it is.
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